I had so wanted to move to Libya. I was ready for the adventure - I wanted to live, eat and breathe another culture and raise my kids with a world view. When it didn't happen I was heartbroken. I had a good cry or two. It was definitely a blow.
With all the tragedy now going on there I can see why God said no.
There have been a few other blows lately. The most recent, we're supposed to close on a house in about 10 days and just found out the loan may not go through due to a lack of comparables.
And other, more personal issues, I can't blog about. Some things need to stay "in the vault" you know.
I just get so tired of being wrong. Of praying over decisions, having all signs point to yes, marching ahead, only to have the door slammed shut as we reach it.
But I know I am still in His hand. I know that even though I may not be hearing Him, He is with me. I know that every defeat builds character and gets me one step closer to the victory. I know that He has plans to prosper me and not harm me.
I know I am in His hand.
*photo credit
amen, beautiful post. it is so very hard to wait for God's timing and to hear him say "no".
ReplyDeletebut, he's always got our backs! :)
God bless~
Oh, it's hard when you're looking for direction and not finding clear step-by-steps. Difficult, when you think all has become clear, and then the rug gets pulled from under your feet again.... :(
ReplyDeleteYes, we know it's all for our good....but that doesn't make it easy whilst on the journey.
God bless x
Your entry moves me so much!! Of course your first lines are very familiar to me but that's quite obvious I guess ;).
ReplyDeleteBut I so know what you mean with "I just get so tired of being wrong". Also for me a few things need to stay 'in the vault' so I'm not talking about it much but I'm definitely going a rough path lately.
Not knowing what to do, what's right, being afraid of what comes next, looking for distraction so that I don't overthink things too much, etc.
I guess all we can do is wait and see... and pray.
But who knows there might be some other adventure coming your way (in a safer country maybe ;) or the next house will be better for you. Or your path of life has to pass some crossroads just to get stronger or whatever (haha that's what I'm telling myself to keep my mind quiet, not that it helps ;)
Anyway I wish you all strength you need!! Life can be tough sometimes!
Take care
You are so right...we are in His hands. Life gets so hard sometimes, I am sorry you are going through a challenging time... just knowing that we can 'lay back against Him and breath, it's overwhelming'! He is in control, His plan is better than ours...I will pray for you, even though I only know you through blogging :). Just rest in Him! Much love,
ReplyDeleteYour fellow sister in Christ!
I'm sorry, Cheryl! Disappointment heaped upon disappointment can definitely be hard to handle!
ReplyDeleteWe're having to make some big (and difficult) decisions now too. It is hard. I will pray for all of you.
~Jennifer
Cheryl, I'll be praying for you that God's plan is evident and you'll be able to see what he wants for you.
ReplyDeleteI know things just haven't been happening the way you have expected they might, Cheryl. Just know that things will work out in time. It's just hard to wait, isn't it?
ReplyDelete(((HUGS))) I'll be thinking of you (as I often do anyway).
Lybia? Wow, I think you are brave for even having that idea!
ReplyDeleteLike Jennifer said, it is difficult with all of life's disappointments. But, God is using you....in your home. You are raising some Godly men...and one that you did not give birth to!
There will be adventures and other ways to be missional....
I confess, I didn't even think about the fact that you were supposed to be in Libya right now as I've been watching all this unfold on the news. I am so glad you and your family are not over there right now.
ReplyDeleteSometimes it's so hard to rest in the fact that God sees the whole picture when we see only a couple of little puzzles pieces (and don't even have the box for reference). I'm so glad He does, though.