That's not entirely true. Though I never met RivkA in real life, I feel that I knew her. She shared her heart, soul and struggles on her blog Coffee and Chemo. Her blog was an honest and encouraging window into her world, the world of living fully, even with cancer.
My friend, yes my friend, RivkA crossed over this morning, late last night in my time zone.
I'm ashamed to say I was surprised. Though I read the words, words like brain mets, liver failure and pain management, I prayed and truly believed that the perfect combination of drugs would be found to whip the cancer and pain back into submission and RivkA would be back to blogging her encouraging stories in a week.
It was not to be.
I was shocked to read the latest post starkly entitled Funeral Arrangements.
So today I am mourning. I am grieving the loss of RivkA's tomorrows. I grieve for the heavy loss her husband and children are to endure. I grieve for the world's loss of this compassionate and vibrant woman. And I grieve for my loss, I will miss reading her words and exchanging comments about child rearing. I grieve the loss of my dream of one day going to Israel and having RivkA show me around. Selfish I know, but I so hoped to meet her in real life one day.
And tomorrow, I will try to put away my grief and be thankful that through the miracle of the internet I had the chance to get to know her. I will be thankful for all the lives she positively impacted. I will think of her children who will carry on her legacy and I will smile. That is what RivkA would had wanted.
If you're fighting cancer or would like to know more about RivkA please read her blog or watch her speak on Coping With Adversity.
My condolences to you and RivkA's family. I haven't read her blog, but she sounds like an incredible person. In today's age of technology, the loss of an Internet friend is still the loss of a friend.
ReplyDeleteSo sad.
ReplyDeleteI so understand what you are saying here. I absolutely think that someone whom you 'know' through the blogging world becomes a part of your life. I do think of the people I 'meet' through blogs or other online ways frequently in daily life. And when someone of that world suddenly leaves this (and your) world that's emotional. So I can understand your grieving. Although you will probably feel a little awkward about it as well, since... did you really know each other? Yeah. In a way yes. But only as far as she let you know her. But isn't that always in life, also in real life? So it's still some kind of friendship. In a modern way I guess. Anyway. What I wanted to say was... take care. Thinking of you!
ReplyDelete