My eldest child turned 14 in March, and it's taken me until now to be able to blog about it. I think this was the toughest birthday for me to get through so far. He wanted no balloons, no party, no grand celebration, just a quiet day at home with his family.
He is steadily drawing closer to becoming that strange and honorable creature...a man. Which means that in the day to day of life, he needs me less and less. And while he still loves me, one day there will come a woman who will take my role as his support and confidant. That's difficult.
But I wouldn't want it any other way, so I stifle my hurt and foster his independence.
I long to see him grow and mature, to reach his full potential and, one day, become the God fearing head of his own family. I hope to be able to cuddle grand babies and babysit on weekends. In order to have all that I need to slowly let him go and grow.
But the letting go sure isn't easy.
Oh, this made me feel a little sad! My baby is 3 months old (already!) and I'm learning they sure grow fast!! I try to remind myself daily that it is my calling to raise him to be a Christian man, that is why God gave him to me!
ReplyDeleteI was told soon after my son was born that grandkids are even better than children! (Which was nice to hear since everybody tells me how fast they grow, cherish every moment, etc.!) I suppose looking forward to grandkids makes it a little less sad!!
It is heartwrenching to parent kids this age! I definitely feel your pain with 17, 14 and 12 year olds in my house!
ReplyDeleteHi, I found you through Texan Mama.
ReplyDeleteI feel you on this issue. My oldest daughter turned 12 in January and it has definitely been the hardest for me so far. And no, it isn't a bit easy letting go!
It sure ISN'T easy! My eldest daughter also turned 14 in March! She is already almost as tall as I am and becoming so responsible. She has a sweet, servant's heart, but no, she doesn't need me as much either, and that can be hard. There is a special bond with the first born. Having them first means more undivided attention and time with them!
ReplyDeleteI sent a little link love your way in the post I just wrote! Hope you didn't mind me mentioning your name!
My son is 10 and is starting to not want me to kiss him anymore. :( And he's also starting to call me Mother instead of Mom or Mommy. (Sniffle)I just hate it!!
ReplyDeleteI know.. I get a lump in my throat when I see how much my 15 yr old can do for himself...
ReplyDeleteThey grow up way too fast. As they get older and I look back on my children's young years, I remember mostly their good moments. Your son is blessed to have a good Mama who loves him alot. That, and faith in God will take him far.
ReplyDeletei have tears in my eyes and i am refusing to blink right now so they won't fall... my son is eight... my bubby... love him 'sniff'
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